


A Pete Wentz Problem

by Bandom_Squirrel



Category: Bandom, Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Funny, M/M, Pete Wentz is a Little Shit, Summer of Like
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-13 06:14:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28773675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bandom_Squirrel/pseuds/Bandom_Squirrel
Summary: Patrick was very possibly slightly tired of hearing about Mikey Way.
Relationships: Mikey Way/Pete Wentz, Patrick Stump/Gerard Way (slight)
Kudos: 16





	A Pete Wentz Problem

Patrick was very possibly slightly tired of hearing about Mikey Way. 

Okay, scratch that, Patrick was extremely tired of hearing about Mikey Way. 

It wasn’t that Patrick didn’t like Mikey. On the contrary, he thought he was a really cool guy, with quite a nice taste in music and a lot of interesting opinions. Sure, he was a bit quiet and aloof at times, but the more Patrick got to know him the more he was able to see past that and see that he was just a chill, funny, and admittedly a bit weird dude. In the end, who couldn’t like Mikey Way?

The problem was that if Pete interrupted one of Patrick’s conversations to tell him about some random thing that Mikey said or did one more time, Patrick was going to lose it. And it was not going to be pretty. 

“And it’s like, it’s not that he had a nice body, you know? I mean, he does, but it’s more of what he does with it that’s cool. And I don’t even mean like in a sexy way. It’s like, he has these really nice legs, but the cool thing about them is that he always folds them all weirdly in a way that should be really awkward, but he looks like he doesn’t even care that it’s awkward, and that’s like, really hot, you know? And-“

“Pete,” Patrick interrupted, his voice tired and strained from having to have said this same thing far too many times in the past few days. Saying that his patience was wearing thin would be about as much of a gross understatement as saying that Pete only kind of liked Mikey. “Shut up.” 

“Why?” Pete asked, seeming somewhere between amused and bewildered, but not particularly bothered. Patrick looked to the other side on the table he’d been sitting at to Joe, who was smirking at Pete. He seemed to find Pete’s obsession with My Chemical Romance’s bassist a lot more hilarious and much less irritating than Patrick did. 

“Because you just interrupted a conversation I was having with Joe about yesterday’s show in order to tell me about your boyfriend’s legs,” Patrick explained slowly, using a tone more suited to speaking to a small child with rather than a man five years his senior. Pete frowned. 

“He’s not my boyfriend.” Joe snorted, and Pete seemed to reconsider. “Well, I mean, he basically is, but we don’t like to call it that.” Patrick was tempted to ask what they were calling it, but decided not to give Pete the opportunity to rant about this any more than he already did. 

“So, do you want to join our conversation like a big boy or go write poetry about your not-boyfriend’s legs that is way too cheesy for me to put in songs?” Patrick questioned, which caused Pete to roll his eyes and huff indignantly. 

“Fuck off man. Writing poetry about Mikey’s legs is totally a big boy thing to do,” Pete defended, and a sly grin spread across his face that alerted Patrick that he did not want to know whatever he was thinking. “I think I’m gonna go find Mikey now, actually. See ya!”

Patrick wondered where Pete had just come from if he was just now going out to find Mikey, but decided instead to use these precious rare moments of time uninterrupted by Mikey’s name to actually finish his conversation with Joe. 

~

There was only so much of Pete Wentz that one person could be expected to deal with in one week, and Gerard was sure he’d surpassed that amount about six days prior. 

Pete wasn’t a bad guy, and Gerard wouldn’t mind having him around in small doses, but he was a lot, and in Gerard’s bus all the time. He had no idea how the rest of Fall Out Boy endured it. Hell, he had no idea how Mikey hadn’t become exhausted of it. 

But really, that was why Gerard never complained. Because even though he himself found Pete to be a bit much at times, which was saying a lot, because he was well aware that he could be a bit of a diva on occasion, Mikey didn’t seem to feel the same way. He would just sit there all smiley and content while Pete would literally climb all over him, talking about things at such a sporadic pace that even Gerard couldn’t follow it. And generally, Gerard was really good at following seemingly random chains of thought. 

For a while, he’d thought that shows would be moments of Pete-free bliss, until he started catching sight of him sitting on the amps out of the corner of his eye. And that would be bearable, if it weren’t for how he made it so completely obvious that he was staring at Mikey’s ass, and it took a lot of energy for Gerard to not think about why Pete Wentz was staring at his little brother’s ass. 

Then, he’d thought that nights would be his escape, until one time he’d seen Pete climb into Mikey’s bunk in the evening, which he’d hoped would just be a short little visit, but the two were still giggling together when the bus started moving, and Gerard realized with a sinking feeling that Pete wasn’t going to leave that night. 

Frank, of course, had teased the living shit out of the two for that, and Ray had threatened to throw Mikey’s phone out the window if they had sex on the bus. Pete had responded to both of those with a leer and innuendos, and Gerard had tried his best to stay out of it and not think about any of it too much. 

It really was a shame that he was getting so sick of Pete. He really did like the guy, and liked how happy he was making Mikey, and he’d like not to have his opinion of the man ruined by being forced to spend more time with him than any human being should ever be expected to. Or by having to think about him and his brother having sex. Both applied. 

~

“Hey Gerard!” Patrick had accepted long ago that it had become his responsibility to babysit Pete, and the other man had been missing and not answering his phone just long enough for Patrick to be worried, but not enough for him to be panicking. The first place he thought to check was the My Chem bus, which Gerard was smoking outside of. “Do you happen to know where Pete is?”

“What? Oh, hi Patrick,” Gerard replied, seeming to have been staring into space and only regaining awareness of the world around him when he heard Patrick’s voice. “Uh, yeah. I think he went to a water park with Mikey.”

“Another one? How do they keep finding them?” Patrick groaned, although part of him was relieved that at least Pete hadn’t wandered off by himself again. That had been a long, stressful night that he wasn’t too keen on repeating. 

“I think Mikey has a bit of a superpower for finding cool places in whatever city we’re in,” Gerard explained, smiling thinly and kind of waving around his hand holding his cigarette in a vague gesture of the world in general. “I’m just glad that Pete’s out of my bus for one goddamn hour.” At that, Gerard blinked, seeming to replay his words in his head, and his eyes widened and his face flushed. “Oh! I didn’t mean that I don’t like Pete, or that I don’t like having him around or anything like that, it’s just…” Gerard flailed his hands, and Patrick understood all too well. 

“Yeah, I know. Pete’s a great guy, he can just be a lot to handle,” Patrick agreed, and Gerard nodded earnestly, seeming relieved that he didn’t think he was trying to offend his friend. 

“Yeah. How do you deal with him every day?” Gerard asked, seeming completely at a loss, which Patrick thought was a fairly standard reaction to being expected to spend extended periods of time with Pete Wentz for the first time. 

“Not easily. Really just an ungodly amount of patience,” Patrick revealed, and Gerard laughed, the noise sort of scratchy with smoke. 

“I’m not always the best with patience. But I don’t want to like, kick him out, because I like seeing Mikey happy, which Pete somehow seems to make happen,” Gerard shared, and Patrick found himself wondering just how much about the situation Gerard knew. At least as much as he did, no doubt, right?

“Yeah, Pete seems to really like Mikey too. A lot. Like, will literally never shut up about him to the point where I want to push him off the moving bus a lot,” Patrick said, and he wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince Gerard that Pete really did like Mikey for the right reasons of if he just needed to vent. 

“They’re insufferable, right? Once you get past the cuteness and being happy for them, it’s like you just want them to be a little less over the top right in front of you,” Gerard ranted, and Patrick leaned against the side of the bus next to him, sensing that this was going to be a long discussion. 

“Exactly! I can be proud of Pete for finding someone without having to listen to him describe Mikey’s orgasm face,” Patrick added, and Gerard grimaced, covering his face with one hand. 

“Ew, that’s my brother you’re talking about,” Gerard complained, and Patrick was about to apologize when the other man looked back up at him, smiling in a manner that suggested he was about a second away from laughing. “Dude, you don’t have to see Pete trying to climb Mikey like a fucking tree every waking moment.” Patrick grinned, pulling his hat down lower on his head. He had so much worse of examples. 

~

Gerard loved Patrick. He came to that decision at around the same time they both stopped prefacing their complaints about their bassists with disclaimers about how they obviously loved them. Because Patrick got it, in a way he hadn’t been sure anyone else really would. 

“But have you seen his blogposts?” Patrick was saying, after Gerard had finished his dramatic recreation of Pete painting Mikey’s toenails in the middle of their bus’ lounge as if no one could just walk in and see that. “I swear to god Gerard, he’s a man obsessed.”

“Hi Patrick! Oh, and hi Gerard!” Both Gerard and Patrick’s heads snapped in the direction of the sound to see Pete and Mikey walking towards them, holding hands all cutely. Mikey was looking right at Gerard, and he immediately felt guilty for complaining about him when he wasn’t there. 

“Hey Gee. Patrick,” Mikey greeted, voice toned a bit lower than Pete’s, and his smile a bit more subtle. He kept looking over at Pete and grinning for a second before schooling his features again, like if he did it fast enough nobody would notice. 

“Did you have fun at the water park?” Gerard asked, because that seemed like the polite thing to ask. Mikey made a motion that could possibly be considered a nod, and Pete nodded quickly. 

“Yeah. What were you two talking about?” Pete asked curiously, wrapping an arm around Mikey’s back in a way that seemed almost subconscious. Mikey didn’t even seem to notice. 

“We were bonding over our mutual hatred of you,” Patrick deadpanned, and Pete gasped dramatically, placing a hand on his chest in an expression of mock horror. 

“Well, Mikey and I formed a club of our own,” Pete proclaimed grandly, nothing short of draping himself over Mikey. Or at least, as much as he could, being a good few inches shorter. “We’re the fraternal order of the handsome boy, and Mikey is the duke of handsomeness.”

“Damn right,” Mikey agreed, lips pursed in a barely suppressed smile. Despite how Pete was trying and failing to subtly feel Mikey up, Gerard couldn’t help but smile at how relaxed his brother seemed. 

“Sounds fun,” Gerard said through a smile, letting out a small laugh at their ridiculousness. Mikey shot a look at him, raising an eyebrow infinitesimally to ask if everything was alright. Gerard nodded. His conversation with Patrick had gotten everything off his chest that he’d needed. 

“Oh, it was,” Pete confirmed lewdly, waggling his eyebrows. Gerard cringed inwardly, and Mikey hit Pete lightly on the side. Patrick just rolled his eyes. “We’re gonna go now, see ya. Oh, and Patrick remind me to tell you later about this really weird looking dog we saw today.” With a sinking feeling, Gerard watched Pete grab Mikey’s hand and kind of drag him towards the door of the My Chem bus. 

“Pete,” Patrick interjected before his friend could get very far. “How about you tell me in just a few minutes, and actually spend the night on your own bus for once?” Gerard could kiss Patrick right then. He wasn’t going to, but it was a close thing. 

“Oh, okay, sure. Can I bring Mikey?” Pete asked, looking a bit thrown off by the question, but not really caring where he was going as long as Mikey was also there. It was kind of sweet. 

“I’m not going to stop you,” Patrick answered, seeming almost resigned, and Gerard was fairly sure that Patrick Stump was in fact god’s gift to the world. That was the only explanation. 

“Okay. Come on.” Pete tried to lead Mikey in the direction of the Fall Out Boy bus, but Mikey paused, glancing suspiciously at Gerard. Gerard shrugged, denying all involvement, and Mikey looked more than a bit doubtful, but quirked a tiny smile. 

“Slow down, motherfucker,” Mikey told Pete, allowing him to resume dragging him across the lot. Gerard was fairly sure he heard Pete say something along the lines of “oops, sorry,” although the two were too far away for him to hear clearly. 

“Thank god for you, Patrick. I might be actually able to fucking sleep tonight,” Gerard thanked sincerely, and Patrick smiled in appreciation. 

“No problem, dude. I can handle Pete. I’m going to go make sure they don’t traumatize Joe and Andy, see you later.” Patrick grinned and waved as he pushed himself off the side of the bus, walking in the direction Pete and Mikey had been headed. Gerard waved back. 

“Bye,” Gerard called, dropping the cigarette that he’d smoked to the filter and crushing it with his toe. He had a whole, Pete-free night ahead of him, and he intended to take full advantage of that. He grinned, walking over the the door of the bus and ready to tell the rest of his band the good news.


End file.
